SCENE II.

(The former scene continued.)

A Gallery discovered opening into the state Room.

Enter SATRIUS with EUDEMUS.

Sat.

Here he will instant be: let’s walk a turn;

You’re in a muse, Eudemus.

Eud.

Not I, sir.

I wonder he should mark me out so! well,

Jove and Apollo form it for the best. [Aside.

Bat.

Your fortune’s made unto you now, Eudemus,

If you can but lay bold upon the means;

Do but observe his humour, and—believe it—

He is the noblest Roman, where he takes——

Enter SEJANUS.

Here comes his lordship.

Sej. Now, good Satrius.

Sat. This is the gentleman, my lord.

Sej.

Is this?

Give me your hand—we must be more acquainted.

Report, sir, hath spoke out your art and learning:

And I am glad I have so needful cause,

However in itself painful and hard,

To make me known to so great virtue.——Look,

Who is that, Satrius? [Exit Sat.]

I have a grief, sir,

That will desire your help. Your name’s Eudemus!

Eud. Yes.

Sej. Sir?

Eud. It is, my lord.

Sej.

I hear you are

Physician to Livia, the princess.

Eud. I minister unto her, my good lord.

Sej. You minister to a royal lady, then.

Eud. She is, my, lord, and fair.

Sej.

That’s understood

Of all her sex, who are or would be so;

And those that would be, physic soon can make them:

For those that are, their beauties fear no colours.

Eud. Your lordship is conceited.

Sej.

Sir, you know it,

And can, if need be, read a learned lecture

On this, and other secrets. ‘Pray you, tell me,

What more of ladies besides Livia,

Have you your patients?

Eud.

Many, my good lord.

The great Augusta, Urgulania,

Mutilia Prisca, and Plancina; divers——

Sej.

And all these tell you the particulars

Of every several grief? how first it grew,

And then increased; what action caused that;

What passion that: and answer to each point

That you will put them?

Eud.

Else, my lord, we know not

How to prescribe the remedies.

Sej.

Go to,

you are a subtile nation, you physicians!

And grown the only cabinets in court,

To ladies’ privacies. Faith, which of these

Is the most pleasant lady in her physic?

Come, you are modest now.

Eud. ‘Tis fit, my lord.

Sej.

Why, sir, I do not-ask you of their urines,

Whose smell’s most violet, or whose siege is best,

Or who makes hardest faces on her stool?

Which lady sleeps with her own face a nights?

Which puts her teeth off, with her clothes, in court?

Or, which her hair, which her complexion,

And, in which box she puts it; These were questions,

That might, perhaps, have put your gravity

To some defence of blush. But, I enquired,

Which was the wittiest, merriest, wantonnest? H

armless intergatories, but conceits.——

Methinks Augusta should be most perverse,

And froward in her fit.

Eud. She’s so, my lord.

Sej. I knew it: and Mutilia the most jocund.

Eud. ‘Tis very true, my lord.

Sej.

And why would you

Conceal this from me, now? Come, what is Livia?

I know she’s quick and quaintly spirited,

And will have strange thoughts, when she is at leisure:

She tells them all to you.

Eud.

My noblest lord,

He breathes not in the empire, or on earth.

Whom I would be ambitious to serve

In any act, that may preserve mine honour,

Before your lordship.

Sej.

Sir, you can lose no honour,

By trusting aught to me. The coarsest act

Done to my service, I can so requite,

As all the world shall style it honourable:

Your idle, virtuous definitions,

Keep honour poor, and are as scorn’d as vain:

Those deeds breathe honour that do suck in gain.

Eud.

But, good my lord, if I should thus betray

The counsels of my patient, and a lady’s

Of her high place and worth; what might your lordship,

Who presently are to trust me with your own,

Judge of my faith?

Sej.

Only the best I swear.

Say now that I should utter you my grief,

And with it the true cause; that it were love,

And love to Livia; you should tell her this:

Should she suspect your faith; I would you could

Tell me as much from her; see if my brain

Could be turn’d jealous.

Eud.

Happily, my lord,

I could in time tell you as much and more;

So I might safely promise but the first

To her from you.

Sej.

As safely, my Eudemus,

I now dare call thee so, as I have put

The secret into thee.

Eud. My lord——

Sej.

Protest not,

Thy looks are vows to me; use only speed,

And but affect her with Sejanus’ love,

Thou art a man, made to make consuls. Go.

Eud.

My lord, I’ll promise you a private meeting

This day together.

Sej. Canst thou?

Eud. Yes.

Sej. The place?

Eud.

My gardens, whither I shall fetch your lordship

Sej;

Let me adore my AEsculapius.

Why, this indeed is physic! and outspeaks

The knowledge of cheap drugs, or any use

Can be made out of it! more comforting

Than all your opiates, juleps, apozems,

Magistral syrups, or—— Be gone, my friend,

Not barely styled, but created so;

Expect things greater than thy largest hopes,

To overtake thee: Fortune shall be taught

To know how ill she hath deserv’d thus long,

To come behind thy wishes. Go, and speed. [Exit Eudemus.

Ambition makes more trusty slaves than need.

These fellows, by the favour of their art,

Have still the means to tempt; oft-times the power.

If Livia will be now corrupted, then

Thou hast the way, Sejanus, to work out

His secrets, who, thou know’st, endures thee not,

Her husband, Drusus: and to work against them.

Prosper it, Pallas, thou that better’st wit;

For Venus hath the smallest...