Chapter Two

I know what you’re thinking, this is taboo confessions not an auto biography of a B-list actress who for a time was a second tier scream queen before becoming a second tier all-purpose genre regular , but everything I’m saying here is going to bring us to what in the eyes of folks who frequent this site, is the main event.

Like the rumors of casting couches that aren’t rumors, the stories of LA and Hollywood catering to wild parties and lifestyles are an understatement. By their standards Barry and I weren’t all that wild, but early on my husband confessed to me that as much as he loved me and wanted my heart to himself, he was more than happy to share my body.

I’d explained before I had no problem with sex, and that continued once I started acting, which due to several scenes with women led me to crossing the line in real life and becoming casually bi-sexual. Traveling in those circles of not just actors and movie producers and directors, but their friends and associates who owned clubs and threw wild parties to say famous people came to them.

I wasn’t famous, but young, hot, easy and eager to play. I never left a party alone and more than once when they were hosted at wealthy people’s massive homes I’d go upstairs with a guy, have some fun, head back down and take another for a ride the same night.

Or, even better, I’d think why choose and let them play Eiffel tower with me. So when Barry brought this up before we married because he wasn’t sure he could live a vanilla monogamous lifestyle, it wasn’t a deal breaker for me, in fact, part of me was relieved because at the time I didn’t know if I could just be with one man sexually.

We would sometimes swap with other couples, I’d often start with the wife, going down on them while their husband took me doggie and Barry waited his turn to fuck the other woman after she came on my tongue.

Those were some wild times, but more often than not Barry liked to watch me with other men. We’d walk around the party to see who was checking me out then if we both agreed, he’d walk over and tell the guy I was in play and if he were interested say the word.

He would watch me suck and fuck, then when the stud DuJour had his balls completely drained by yours truly, Barry would step out of the batter’s box and fuck me flat out stupid.

I’d already be tired and used by then and often didn’t do much more than lay on my back or roll over and put my ass up while he took me harder than he ever did when it was just the two of us. It was him sharing me, but in the end proving to the other man that I was his, and in the end, he always claimed what was his.

This is where my hypocrisy comment comes in. The same man who said I should be careful in movie roles now that I had a son was the same guy who wanted me to continue to be a hot wife, or willing partner in a marital trade off.

I know there is a difference in me being onscreen baring my tits and ass to countless people in theaters and then cable, DVD, now streaming. Once a movie was made it was never going to go away.

Meanwhile, our games were private and although some of the men recognized me, some were even others in the industry, and I could write a fun tell all about some of the cocks I sucked and had inside me, but it was honor among thieves there and no one was outing anyone.

Sure, some other men who knew who I was with blabbed about it, but whatever, my husband was there with me, so blackmail wasn’t really a fear. I got a thrill out of being a fun story they could tell their friends who in turn would tell them “Cool story, bro.”

As time went on, we did slow down. Not from lack of desire, but Barry’s name was getting bigger, and he was now working with directors and learning some of that trade, including getting behind the camera on the sets of some of the movies he was scripting.

Anyone who has had a rather adventurous sex life will tell you that it’s like any other rush, it’s great for a while, but at some point you still feel like you could up the game. That’s where Barry’s newfound skill with a camera came in.

He suggested filming our next encounter and my first reaction was no, it was exciting enough, but he insisted it would make things even more fun, and we’d be able to watch the movies whenever we wanted.

I still wavered, I mean, not like I was camera shy, but something in my gut said it was a risk we didn’t need to take, as it was with Todd getting older, I was now leaning towards wondering if we should keep up our lifestyle.

This was in my mind more than ever due to Todd experiencing his first incident involving my past. It happened when he was in eighth grade, one of his classmates meeting me and knowing who I was, found some pictures of me online and harassed Todd over it. I felt awful, and by that time I hadn’t even done semi nudes in two years, but let’s get back to my point of these things were forever.

The teasing was brutal, boys telling him they’d seen his mother’s tits and how there were scenes of me kissing women while topless and kissing their tops in my earlier work.

Barry was of course upset and concerned for him, but didn’t blame me, which I always appreciated. He tried to explain to Todd that the things I’d done helped give him the life he had, big house, inground pool, anything he wanted and going to a good school.

But I can’t imagine how hard it was for him and whenever he was upset felt his pain even more because I’d caused it without meaning to. Being at that age, he lashed out a few times saying it was my fault and how could I do those things, and all his friends said I was a slut and a whore.

There were many times I thought imagine if he knew about the things I’d done with and for his father and now here he was