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RETURN OF THE BRUTE
Minnie Lane is a dating and personal development coach for men based in London. She briefly became involved in the seduction community in 2007 when she was twenty-two. ‘I joined the industry by complete fluke or serendipity, depending on which way you look at it,’ she tells me over Zoom.
It all started when she was out at a bar. A man was hitting on her and she recognised some of the things he was doing. She had readThe Game and proceeded to call him out on it. As it turned out, he’d not only readThe Game but was a pickup coach. They then had a long conversation about the industry (Lane had recently completed a psychology degree and was interested in social dynamics). She was ‘fascinated by the whole [pickup] world’ but also not as ‘appalled by it’ as she ‘probably should have been’. The pickup instructor invited her along to one of his workshops and, her curiosity piqued, she accepted. Perhaps unsurprisingly she was the only woman present on the boot camp. ‘Some of the students would come and ask my opinion on things. And then one of the trainers was like, “Why don’t you have a go helping some of the guys with their conversation skills?” And it turned out I was very good at it, so they asked me to stay.’
Lane ended up going out with the instructors and their students to bars and clubs in London every weekend for several months. ‘It was a fun Saturday job. I’m getting paid cash in hand to go out and chat to people and go to bars.’ Almost two decades on, Lane is candid about the fact that she ‘got sucked into’ the pickup industry. ‘I think I justified it to myself by saying, “I’m not going to teach anything that I wouldn’t want done to me,”’ she says, before adding that at the time she had ‘very low standards about how people should or shouldn’t treat me’.
Lane describes the industry as full of ‘gateway behaviours’ that can escalate over time. ‘It’s the small things, like asking a client to rate a woman’s attractiveness on a scale of one to ten. At the time, I would just be like, that’s efficient and helps me to quickly learn his type. Now I would never do that because I can see how it affects the way people are thinking. You’re making