1. HOOK, LINE& SINK HER
No B-Word on the Boat
I was minding my own business at the Baraga County Lake Trout Festival which, me being a reporter, means I was minding everyone else’s business when I was suddenly cast into darkness.
It was Ed Fugenschuh. He’d stepped between me and the sun, and the planet didn’t stand a chance. Ed looked down at me, big as a mountain and rough as Lake Superior in a stiff northeast wind, and rumbled, “I want you to research somethin’.”
My first thought was, controversy! I am not a huge fan of controversy. My personal motto is, “Got a problem? Call a cop.” And I was just about to suggest Officer Pat Butler, who is great with kids and probably fishermen too and even gives out stickers, when Ed said, “Bananas on a boat.”
I was still in the dark but now I was beaming, because this was just the type of story I was born to write.
Putting pen to notepad, I took down the facts. Ed’s team was enjoying a great start in the festival’s Keweenaw Classic Fishing Tournament. They’d boated a nine-pound salmon, then a five pounder. Then someone ate a banana and the fish quit biting.
“What is it with bananas on boats?” Ed asked.
He’d also heard that when another fisherman in the tournament brought out a piece of banana bread, he was forced to throw it overboard.
If there is one thing that sets this reporter’s pen on fire, it is the shameful waste of baked goods, especially if they are buttered. Snapping my notepad closed, I promised Ed I would get to the bottom of this, using every available resource known to mankind.
That’s right. I Googled it.
After having spent several hours on the computer, I am confident in reporting there’s not much new on Facebook. Also, there is some substance to the popular belief that bananas have no place on fishing boats.
The theory dates all the way back to Caribbean trade in the 1700s. Sailboats had to hurry to deliver bananas before their expiration date. Sailors liked to troll during deliveries, and banana boats moved too fast for the fish to catch up to the bait.
Another theory holds that tropical spiders and snakes sometimes boarded with the bananas, which made it tough for the sailors to focus on their fishing. Still another notes that when boats carrying bananas sunk, all that was left behind was floating fruit, which was very incriminating to bananas in general.
Fish apparently don’t like the smell of bananas, which can transfer from hand to lure. On an interesting side note, I used to have a licorice-scented rubber frog in my tackle box when I was a kid. As an attractant it ranked right up there with bananas, but it made my box smell better.
Finally, there are charter boat captains who absolutely prohibit the use of Banana Boat sunscreen products on their boats, just because they include the b-word. One won’t even allow Fruit of the Loom underwear on his boat because of the bananas on the labels, and gives great big wedgies to offenders.
Ed, I hope this answers your question. Next time, how about