XII. Beyond sadness

marok's swoon slowly dissipated and his thoughts gradually became clearer.

"Amarok, are you awake?" a voice asked.

The wolf blinked slowly and bright light blinded him. He cautiously opened his eyes and stared for a moment at a snow-white ceiling."Where ... where am I?" he asked.

"You fell. Your friend found you in your bathroom."

Confused, the Samoyedan sat up when he saw a vixen standing next to his bed, caringly stroking the back of his bandaged head and smiling.

"What happened?" he murmured, squinting his eyes because his head was pounding terribly. Everything was blurry and unreal. Was he dreaming, was he hallucinating?

"You had a gastric rupture," the fawn explained,"and then you got a nasty concussion on top of that. We didn't think you were going to make it. That was a last-minute rescue."

"Who are you?" the male wanted to know, looking at her seriously.

"I am Jeremia," the vixen replied calmly, bowing."I was with Joliyad before you, for a few days at least," she went on to explain, causing Amarok to look stunned.

"Oh, he told me about you guys. But that was a long time ago. How is it thatyou and I, of all people, shouldrun into each other?"

Jeremia sat down on a chair that was next to the hospital bed."Well," she began,"I wanted to be an aerospace engineer. I changed my mind, though. Broke up with my boyfriend a few months ago and became a healer. It's a job that's more needed here now. When emigration to Samojadja was allowed for some professionals a few years ago, I moved to this hospital."

Jeremia held out a picture of their former friend Joliyad to the impressed wolf, with only him smiling.

"I don't know this picture at all," said the male wolf softly and took it. He looked at it, crying silently."He was so cute," he said bitterly, and Jeremia just nodded, because she understood very well the pain he was feeling now.

"What have I done?" continued Amarok, crying.

"Amarok," the vixen interrupted him,"read what's written on the back."

The male dog turned the picture over and could not believe what he was reading:"For my Amarok! Whenever you are lonely, my darling, I am with you!" Below it was drawn a kiss smiley and finished the dedication with"Your vixen Joliyad" and a self-painted heart.

When he read this, Amarok became even sadder and sobbed with narrowed eyes. He kept hitting himself on his thighs with his fists, whereupon Jeremia calmed him down.

"Amarok, calm down! Don't do that! Listen to what I have to tell you," she begged.

The wolf stopped hitting, turned his head to his visitor and looked at her in despair.

"You had this photo in your apartment, Amarok," she said, wide-eyed.

"What?" he asked incredulously."That's bullshit! I've never seen it before!"

"Yes, it’s true, I'm not lying to you. It was hanging in your bathroom by the mirror. Your buddy brought it here with you. Where else would I have gotten it?" she replied.

The stricken man pondered: So was this supposed to mean that he had always possessed this photo, but hadforgotten aboutit? How could that be? This could not happen to him! One did not simply forget something so beautiful. Besides, it was the last thing left of his friend."This can't be true! I'm such a complete idiot!" he berated himself.

"Well, if you had cleaned your mirror more often..." the vixen admonished sternly.

"I had a gastric rupture, you say? How did it happen?" he now wanted to know.

"You've obviously been drinking a lot for a long time."

"That's true," the wolf was ashamed and lowered his head in embarrassment.

"It has healed, thanks to state-of-the-art technology, but the next binge could be your last. I just wan