Chapter 1
I Dreamt of an Easy Life
Wife, white picket fence, and PTA meetings. I dreamt of homemade dinners, evenings in front of the TV, and kids. I dreamt of an easy life and got the hardest life imaginable.
Wedding Day in Belize
Kat slaps my butt with roses.
One year after our wedding day in Belize. Kat is paralyzed from her neck down, and I help Kat put her lipstick on. This was right before Kat went on stage to brief about resiliency at the LA Air Force base.
Chapter 2
Year One—Emergency Room at Long Beach Hospital
I was laying on a hard, cold, metal surface in the emergency room, shaking uncontrollably. I was in shock and gasping for water.
I had smashed my head into the windshield and then fallen headfirst out of the Range Rover. In the ER, they hadn’t seen that my vertebra was broken, and someone turned my head from side to side while I was lying on the metal gurney. The ER nurse even said, “He seems good to go.” That should have been it for me. I should have died.
I was asked to get up. I tried, but I couldn’t move my head. Every time I tried to move, it was like an elephant stomping on my head. I told the ER nurses, “I can’t move.” I raised my voice and said, “I can’t get up!” There was silence. Minutes later, I was strapped in with a neck brace and ordered not to move at all. My neck was broken, my skull was cracked, and I was in unbearable pain.
The doctor looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Your wife will be paralyzed for the rest of her life.”
At that moment, I didn’t know who the doctor was, but when she said it, I believed her. Her dark intense eyes reinforced every word she said.
For some reason, the neurosurgeon, Dr. Nargess, needed to tell me that right then and there, in the midst of all the blood, broken bones, pain, and chaos. This was mere moments after we had gotten out of the ambulance and rolled into the emergency room. Maybe Dr. Nargess knew it would save me. Maybe she saw something in me. Maybe it was just her way of being.
That moment changed my life forever. There was no going back after that.
“Your wife will be paralyzed, neck down, for life,” she repeated, and walked a