2

The Law

Someone once said, “God and I have a wonderful relationship. It’s people who mess it up.” In a world filled with imperfect, immature, and inconsistent inhabitants, it’s no wonder that it takes only two individuals to twist a relationship into something that can be more painful than a toothache and more annoying than a cricket chirping at midnight. Many times, on the surface, a couple may look as if all the wrinkles have been smoothly pressed and ironed out, but in truth, serious problems may be stuffed beneath the surface, camouflaged with an isn’t-life-wonderful disguise.

Todd and Debbie were like that. When they started attending our church, we thought they were the ideal couple. Outwardly, it appeared they had everything going for them.

They were a handsome pair with great personalities who had outstanding potential in every area. Todd worked at a lucrative job; and Debbie, who was exceptionally talented, supplemented their income in a business she started on her own. Looking on, one would say they were living a storybook life. However, all was not as it seemed. One day, Todd showed up at our door in tears. He sorrowfully announced that Debbie had left him and the kids, and was filing for divorce. His countenance showed deep hurt as he confessed his inability to grasp what had gone wrong. We listened, talked, and prayed with him, and after a while, I agreed to meet with Debbie.

A few days later, when I sat across from her, I looked into the eyes of someone else wounded and disillusioned with obvious signs of growing bitterness. As Debbie opened up to me, she told how her husband had hurled innuendos, put-downs, and sarcasm at her for years. He had either been indifferent to her pain or simply insensitive to her needs. She had put up with that form of abuse for quite a while and probably meted out some of her own as she endeavored to alleviate the hurt and disappointment of a relationship gone sour. The marriage was over as far as she was concerned. I could see she was not ready to hear or receive advice or take even one step toward salvaging their tattered relationship. I prayed with her and let her go hoping that at some future date, they would come to their senses and make the changes necessary to rebuild what the devil and ignorance had destroyed.

You will notice I mentionedignorance, along with the devil, as being the culprit behind the demolition of relationships. If a couple doesn’t know wha