Age Five (1973)

School

nurse touches my back got crooked like a old lady is how I look the school nurse asks if I’m okay with her finger it crawls up my spine like a spider is how it feels

bend over so I do hands together so I do the school lady checks my back every Friday before lunch when the other kids do art shirt off the spider crawls up my back follows my spine until it reaches my head knock knock

my back’s getting worse because my head’s too heavy from thinking the school lady saysWhy is your back getting worse you’re too young I don’t tell her about my heavy head from the thinking

school nurse says: are you okay

I say: yes

now I look just like a old lady crooked and bent I get a cane and hobble to school with it not really but I could from being so crooked other kids make art a spider crawls up my back my back is a s stands for snake ssssnake like the big one in my bed crawls up lives where my spine used to be

school nurse calls me in special on a Monday to talk with a school man the school man and the school nurse say take your shirt off so I do hands together so I do the school nurse saysSee one two three she counts up my back with her spider leg fingers until she gets to a spot then her spider leg crawls over my rib under my arm

Where did you get this the school nurse says with her spider leg finger on the new spot I shrug my shoulders to tell her I don’t know but my hands are pressed together it’s hard to moveDo you have any more the school man says I stand up straight like a arrow pull my pants down

the school nurse and the school man sayOh so I pull my pants up they call in my mom and another school lady and a policeman who takes pictures of my crooked back with my pants down my mom says she doesn’t know anything maybe it was the babysitter they ask me I shrug my shoulders bent over like a old lady from thinking too much

the policeman and the new school lady take me into custody until matters are resolved I don’t know what matters are and when I ask the school nurse what does matters are resolved mean she saysOh you are just like a little parrot I don’t ask no more questions I wonder if the school nurse is going to walk up my crooked back anymore with her spider leg fingers

I sleep in a new house with some people I don’t know I eat oatmeal in the morning the policeman and the new school lady bring me in for questioning ask about the crooked back the s snake the spots on my butt I shrug my shoulders that’s all shrug shoulders bend over one two three they find the spots on my back and my butt

I get released for a lack of evidence back to my house I go I eat at my house and sleep at my house and go to school every morning the school nurse walks up my back the other kids do art Christmas comes and goes and I forget about how I ate oatmeal at some other house I did not know the name of

What does lack of evidence mean I say to mom she grabs my arm and saysStop repeating grown up words no one likes a smarty pants five year old who acts like a parrot

one day the school nurse crawls up my back with her spider legs while the other kids make Valentine hearts knock knock she taps on my headDo you get headaches No is what I say but her spider legs keep crawling to the topWhat’s this the school nurse feels a spot on the top of my head bumped up like a little rock she pulls apart my hair with her busy fingers finds a spot like the one