The Comforts of Home

On his first Saturday in America, Kai Regenbogen has been invited to the home of his"Company Buddy", Big Jim Macintyre.

"How'd ya' like ta' come by tomorrow afternoon and see how real Americans live, right up close and personal?", is the way Big Jim phrased the invitation the day before in the office. He had a big smile on his face, and he was already leaning forward a bit, ready to give Kai a slap on the back of the shoulders and flood him with a hearty"Yeeeaaaaa!" right after the acceptance, which is exactly what followed.

While the invitation is not exactly required by"Corporate Policy", itis mentioned near the top of the list in the"Good Ideas!" memo that is sent when a worker is about to begin upon his"new journey" of being a"Company Buddy" (and that"journey" definitely looks good on one's record when bonuses are discussed in the"Employee Review" each year).

As Kai pulls up to the curb on Saturday in his moderately-sized green hybrid, he sees Big Jim out on the front lawn. Jim is wearing shorts that go half-way down his legs, his T-shirt hanging loose over his stomach, and he is tugging at a garden hose, scowling defiantly at the place where it is caught on one of the stepping stones that lead around the house.

As Kai closes his car door and walks up the driveway, Big Jim's contracted facial features suddenly morph into those of a welcoming party host, his eyes expanding and his mouth opening wide, like a thick toad trying to catch flies.

"Hey, dude! Youmade it!", as if a great challenge has been overcome and Kia's great times are only now about to begin.

Jim throws down the loops of the garden hose. It's a complicated release, like freeing one's fingers from molasses, and he frowns angrily at the adversarial hose once again until he is free of its insolent grasp.

"Welcome to my castle!", Big Jim says, putting his arm around his guest's shoulder and walking with him to the front door (Jim had been sweating a bit from the garden work, and Kai can feel it through his shirt).

It's a somewhat large house, or rather, it's laid out to look somewhat larger than it actually is: there are various rooms, piled one upon the other like boxes, with some protruding forward and some recessed, like the contours of a fat woman in a thin dress.

Kai tries to place the architectural style in his mind: supporting the overhang above the front entrance with its Antebellum flair, there is a simplified version of two classic Greek columns, with swirling rococo decorations at the base and head, as well as gothic ornamentation around the windows. It looks like a"Greatest Hits" pop collection of architectural history.

"Did you design the house?", Kai asks tentatively.

"No, it was built when the rest of the development was put in", Jim says."But it's a